Singing lessons

 I really need some.

The other day, our Buddhist teacher told me and the Husband to teach some of his 

newer students a Buddhist song.

If I have a hidden performing streak, this should be thrilling.

Problem is, I can't sing.

I don't have enough 'air' to lift up my voice and belt out songs in a Whitney-Houston way.

Neither do I have the 'air' to stretch my voice over high notes, without my voice breaking.

Whatever that comes out is just wisps and wisps of my voice.

Like cotton candy. 

If it can sing.

The Husband is much better than me.

He took part in a company-organised karaoke competition before.

Never mind that he didn't win.

The point is, if you dare to compete, you must be of something, right?

Aiyah, for guys, they are naturally more thick-skinned than ladies.

I am horrified at the idea of embarrassing myself in front of 

 the newer students.

The Husband doesn't really care how he sounds anyway.

The last time I took part in a singing contest was at 10 years old. 

Under the forceful eyes of my mum.

I don't know what she saw in me.

Don't ask me what I sang. 

It was a nightmare. 

I usually do whatever homework I'm given. 

Obedient student, I am. 

But this time, I tried to whine/protest/reason/grumble my way through.

Didn't work. Not even a single bit

A strict teacher, I have.

*pulls hair*

I printed out sheets of the lyrics.

From the same laser printer that churns out all address labels of TFL customers.

Even enlarge the fonts so that everyone can read easily.

Do you know you can print 2 pages into one A4 sheet, like how I did?

By doing that, it saves paper and isn't it easier to hold on to a A5-sized lyrics sheet than A4?

I'm so smart!

All for the name of saving trees!

I bought this paper cutter from Popular a few years ago.

Almost donated it to Salvation Army, having not use it for almost 1 year plus.

So happy to dig it out to cut the lyrics sheets!

It doesn't just cut paper straight.

This paper cutter can make permanent fold lines, allowing you to do a handmade card/brochure.

And it can cut 'dashed' lines!

Like those ticket coupons, 'tear along this line' kind of function!

So cool right!

That's why this thing costs me S$30+, if I remember correctly.

By the way, gals, spot my veins-infused hand?

All those years of flying and doing manual labour onboard.

Nights before that fateful day, the Husband & I were voraciously practising.

We were to sing together but our voices were at different pitches and couldn't harmonise well. 

Been too long since we 'karaoked' for duets.

In a desperate attempt to hear how bad I sounded, I tried recording my singing with my ancient Nokia phone.

It was bad.

The recording quality, I mean.

I couldn't hear the flaws in my voice from a muffled playback.

So that night, I got the Husband to record our singing with his Iphone.

After some fumbling with the menu, we were greeted with a screen that looked something like this.

Boy, we were impressed!

Even a simple voice recording function in the Iphone has such a swanky feel!

I felt like I'm doing some recording in the studio with that big microphone!

With a VU (Volume Unit) meter to boot!

Iphone has a built-in microphone.

But that mike picture will give you the illusion that you are singing to it, instead of the phone's mike. 

We did like 10-15 recordings that night.

It was hilarious. 

Because they were all so terrible.

We could all hear our flaws in our voices.

I get so conscious about my singing that I exert too much effort in pronouncing the words.

And there's the lack of energy, the severe lack of 'air', the flat singing, the 走音, the 破音, the 沒音，the mis-pronunciation of words, the lack of control, the disharmony of our voices...my cotton candy singing and the Husband singing like a bull.
I think he got stage fright halfway.

If you need to find something silly to laugh about, here you are!
The best among the worst.
So you can imagine how lousy we sounded in the other 10 over recordings.
Pardon my laughter. It was so frustrating in a funny way.

 

I don't know how the new students are going to learn the song the right way.
From us, that is.

One day, I'm going to learn singing proper.

I love anonymity.

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

《懺悔歌》

作曲:淨思居士, 作詞:淨思居士
我們一起來懺悔, 遠離那世間是與非。
我們現在來懺悔, 放下煩惱與怨恨嗔恚。
我們用心來懺悔, 願彌陀擦乾我的淚。
我們真誠來懺悔, 願彌陀洗滌我心扉。

往昔所做諸惡罪, 皆因貪瞋癡所累。
我今皆懺悔, 不願再違背, 彌陀無怨無私的教誨。
不管身心有多疲憊, 求生淨土願不退。
我今皆懺悔, 念佛不怕累；
斷煩惱，彌陀永相隨。