I love Tomato Mask!

 I heard so much about Tony Moly's Tomato Mask, before the store opened in Singapore. 

All the amazing whitening/brightening effects etc etc etc.

Had wanted to buy it from Gmarket. 

But I am often so busy that I do not have the time to explore new shopping sites. 

So the week before Mid-Autumn Festival, the Husband drove me to Bugis Junction for my annual mooncakes 'pilgrimage'.

Every year, East Ocean will have their booths facing the Sony store.
Wonder if it is a deliberate decision.

 This year, there were lesser vendors at Bugis Junction for the mooncake fair.

Thought I might be able to find Goodwood Park durian mooncakes there.

But I was not willing to squeeze with the crowd at Takashimaya.

Boy, I am so happy that this year, East Ocean (東海) has several booths at new places.

They have been my favourite mooncake choice for the past decade.

The mini snowskin mooncake with lotus paste!

#faithfultaurus

 

Takashimaya, Bugis Junction & Lot 1 are the usual venues for the past, I think, at least 8 years.

This year, they also opened up mooncake stalls at Compass Point & Nex!

Maybe next year, I won't have to travel all the way to town anymore!

I tried Cookie Museum's mooncakes too this year. They're great too!

But I still like East Ocean's version most!

#stubborntaurus

 Every year, they will have 10% discount off the listed prices. 

Woohoo!

My current obsession of dressing in nude colours and carrying small sling bags recently.
Realised when I wear shoes like above, my broad feet look especially big.
Oh well, don't wanna waste the shoes either.

After getting the mooncakes, I spotted a Tony Moly store!

Mad excited!!
I was pulling the Husband and repeating, "I want to buy the tomato! I want to buy the tomato!"
He was confused, to put it mildly. Haha!

Deciding if I should get something from their Egg series.
Looks adorable but I had not read any reviews about them before.
So maybe next time!
I prefer buying skincare products that I have done some research on before.
 Cute packaging & sales talk do not work on me.

My verdict on Tony Moly's Tomatox oxygen bubble mask:

Yes! I think it's a good buy at S$26.90!

I've used it twice so far! It works everytime in mildly whitening/brightening the face.

For those who are keen, here's the ingredient list in the mask, extracted from Tony Moly Singapore's site:

Key ingredients include: Sodium Hyaluronate, Xylitol, Hydrogenated Coconut Oil, Isopropyl Myristate, Butylene Glycol, Portulaca Oleracea Extract, Tocopheryl Acetate, Sunflower Seed Oil , Tomato Fruit and Water

My sensitive skin is happy with it! =D

On TFL launch period, I survive on 2-3 hours of sleep daily.
If I need to look presentable for whatever, my trick is to slap on a sheet of my red wine mask the night before, after bathing.
'Mask' for 15 minutes, before going through the usual moisturising regime.
The next day, after I bath, I will apply the Tomatox mask for 3-5 minutes, continue dressing up and rinse it off afterwards.
Usual moisturising regime and then apply my BB Labs makeup base.

This helps to reduce the dullness in my sleep-deprived skin and I definitely look brighter!
Do you realise sleeping late will cause the skin to look darker too?

Both masks replenish the moisture lacking in my skin, caused by the poor sleep cycles.
The makeup base & blusher will sit better on my skin too.

Given that the effect of the Tomatox mask only lasts a day, I thought it would be wasted if I apply it the night before.
Might as well apply it on that day I'm going out to get the maximum benefit before it fades!

If not for my slightly blood-shot eyes and eye bags, no one could really tell that I only have 2-3 hours sleep for 2 days straight.
If you have some important event and already have plenty of sleep, you can still try using my method for more radiant skin!
Hope it works for you!

Randomly, I miss carrying lanterns on Mid-Autumn Festival.

The traditional paper ones.

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

媽媽真厲害！

 I remembered watching Ms Jamie Teo on national TV, when she participated in Miss Singapore 2001.

The question she got during the Q&A session was something like,

"What do you think it's the greatest challenge to modern women?"

Jamie's answer was, if I remembered correctly,

"Being a married woman who have to balance the difficulties of managing her family & the challenges of having her own career."

Pardon me that I couldn't remember word for word. 

But that is the essence of her answer.

My reaction at that time was...duh? -___-

Thought it should be a more epic answer.

I just joined the working world then.

Now I totally take that back. 

Ever since we moved into our own home 3 years ago and started TFL, it finally dawned on me the realism of Jamie's answer.

And my inadequacy in performing well enough in my mutliple roles.

I am very impressed by my mum-in-law. 

How she managed to take care of her family (4 of them) and supported her husband in whatever he did.

After I become a wife, I fully realise how noble my mum and my mum-in-law are and how difficult it is to stay on the path.

無怨無悔不是那麽容易。

And to be good at it, that's even more impossible.

I count myself lucky that I have been surrounded by very inspiring & dedicated women all my life.

My mum, my aunt, my godmum, my grandaunts, my grandma and my mum-in-law.

姜真的是老的辣！

 Sometimes when I am down, I count on my memories of them to pull me through. 

Cannot fall, cannot fall, must be strong to hold up everything.

要堅強才能一直撐起整個家。

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mum-in-law started working as a pre-school teaching assistant about a few months ago.

She loves the job a lot. 

I remember her calling me and sharing with me her new job & work environment with joy.

She has not worked for a quite a long time. 

We are all really happy for her that everything is going well.

She even received Teachers' Day presents from the kids, which really brought her lots of smiles. 

Mum-in-law built this 'MRT train' at home, all by herself, with pieces of styrofoam and coloured paper. 

It was to teach the kids the various modes of transport in Singapore.
Mum even wrapped the props with plastic, so that they will be more durable.
I love the train's headlights! So cute! Hahaha!

She even added in the driver's console and stuck the yellow tape on the floor, just like the real platform!

Bet you didn't see the emergency alarm button, 'reserved for people with special needs' sticker and the MRT lines map located above the seats!

I am so impressed!

She might be a part-timer but look at her dedication and effort!

The Husband says Mum is now 'building' a ship at home.

Knowing my mum-in-law, I'm certain she will excel. =)

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

No, no horror shows

 If you have been checking back everyday, you might just think I must be very free to blog 3 days in a row.

I foresee I won't have blogging time, come next week.

Nah, I'm blogging after all the emails are done. 

That explains how 'early' my blog posts are published. *wink*

Usually, after I'm done with TFL work, I spend time checking out other blogs/sites for leisure, knowledge and inspiration.

That takes up quite a bit of time, unknowingly.

So I thought, hey, why don't I spend the time to create material for my own blog instead?

我也可以創造自己的天空！！！

Hahaha!

Think I picked that up from some idol drama I watched previously.

Oh, by the way, a reader asked on my Formspring for my review on Salon Vim, because of my previous entry.

For those who are keen, read more over HERE!

Been seeing a number of Nuffnang ads running on my blog recently.

I'm very kiasu, and you can see I have 3 spaces on my blog, dedicated to Nuffnang ads. 

#gianpengSingaporean

They're quite fun to look at, with all the moving graphics on my plain Jane blog.

#lame

Plus, they allow me to catch up with the latest stuff that marketers from big companies are rolling out.

#evenmorelame

Alright, alright, let's move on to why the late-night decision to blog today!

Do you see it yet?

The Nuffnang ad on the right?

I grabbed that screen shot when the ad was at its most serene moment. 

Some might interpret it as THAT moment just before the movie scares the hell out of you.

I don't like horror shows. 

Man, my heart stopped for a moment when I loaded my blog and saw the ad.

I thought it would never beat again.

Ever since I can buy my own movie ticket, I have never watched The Ring, Dark Waters or any Western/Asian horror show, no matter how mild it is.

I can't fathom the idea of scaring myself out so much that I don't even dare to go to the toilet or be on my own at night, anywhere.

The Husband shares the same sentiments as me. 

Once when I was trying to send photos from his Iphone to my email, I saw a video picture of this pretty, sweet-faced, Thai-looking gal.

The photo was taken in an office environment. 

I thought it might be his colleague.

It was 530am.

I went to woke him up & demanded to know who the gal was and why her video clip was in his phone.

He replied, dazed, saying he had no idea and that it was downloaded/sent to him via some app accidentally.

I clicked on the video.

The girl said hi in such a saccharine tone and with such sweet-faced innocence that I was ready to pick a quarrel with the Husband.

Who cares that it was in the middle of the night and he needed to wake up early later?

 

Then, at that spilt second, the graphics morphed into a Ailen Predator kind of monster, charging forward, complete with a ferocious roar and knife-sharp teeth.

We freaked out.

I threw the phone on the bed with the Husband shouting, "DELETE! DELETE!"

It was a 5 second clip.

I think it's evil that people do something like that to Iphone users.
Really.
There's karma, boys.
I assume it's boys who are most likely to possess the computer animation ability.

I had to be the one to do the deleting. 

Because the Husband is a complete timid mouse when it comes to anything horror.

You know, the kind of person that holds a big fat cushion and covers his whole face, when a horrow show is playing.

And will scream & break off all ties with you if you even dare playfully tug at his cushion shield.

I hope the ad go away soon.

Like now.

I wonder if Nuffnang has an option to choose the genre of movie ads I prefer.

Can't believe I have to hold my breath when my blog loads.

I much rather look at the Olay ad with 4 beaming bloggers.

Even looking at the dental ad showing teeth mould is so much more therapeutic.

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

Back from the salon

 I just had my haircut done at Salon Vim. 

If you're a keen blog reader, I'm sure you would have read about this salon on one of those famous blogs.

No, I'm not promoting for them. 

Nor am I recommending them.

My last haircut was done in April.

The perks of having long hair. 

You can save on haircuts!

And probably spend the money on colouring, perming, rebonding, treatment...or online shopping. =D

My last soft rebonding plus treatment was done last April.

At another salon.

I like black hair and let my white hair flourish so I don't colour my hair.

Barely cut it in a vain attempt to have it grow till my waist.

Very save money, you know.

Only to realise that my thick glorious mane is too heavy for me to bear. -___-

Think I digressed. 

This entry is not about my hair and I.

But about this guy friend of mine who doesn't have much luck in finding a good & affordable hairstylist.

He used to cut his hair at those neighbour salons.

He prefers male hairstylists, who in his opinion are better in their craft than the ladies.

Actually, I think so too.

No need shampoo or blow.

S$13 per haircut. 

Cheap and good.

No need to spend too much time queuing or washing hair.

Then the stylist left for greener pastures out of the blue.

Leaving him stranded. 

He managed to find another guy at another neighbourhood salon. 

This hairstylist was good enough and he was, erm, effeminate.

I don't know about you, but I've come to a conclusion that most effeminate guys are better hairstylists.

But the problem with effeminate guys is that they can get emotional easily too.

So sometimes his cuts are not symmetrical or too punky for his liking.

I missed out mentioning this.

This guy friend works as a consultant. 

So his hairstyle must be the very professional and proper kind.

Source: Google images

No fringe covering the forehead and eyebrows and eyes.

No hairline touching the collar.

Source: Google images

No hair covering/touching the ears.

 No pouffy hair crown.

Source: Google images

Yes, that means no F4, Jay Chou nor Jackie Chan kind of hairstyle.

More like Andy Lau's classic hairstyle.

Slope behind, slope at the sides, top cut short a bit but not too short or it will be too funky. 

Sounds simple?

Source: Google images

Inserting a photo of Andy's Lau side view, for the definition of slopes.

Clean-cut, neat, smart-looking and boyish.

Basically, it's like what primary schoolboys have, right?

Guess what?

It seems to be an insurmountable feat for most male hairstylists nowadays.

I would never believe my friend if I never see it for myself. 

Shouldn't all male hairstylists know how to cut such a hairstyle?

I'm pretty sure they weren't bald, flaunting long hair or sporting bobs when they were little kids.
It's not that unfamiliar a hairstyle, isn't it?

Having enough of the effeminate stylist's yo-yo emotions, my friend went to Reds salon at Tampines Mall.

It was an impromptu decision. 

He walked past the salon, knew he needed a haircut and walked in.

Picked a random hairstylist who wasn't happy that my friend didn't want his hair shampooed.

Made a small fuss.

When the haircut was done, the hairstylist used a hairdryer to blow the cut hair away.

Plus, pulled open my friend's shirt collar and aimed the hairdryer nozzle in.

That meant quite an amount of cut hair at the collar went all the way inside.

We thought the problem lied with the emo hairstylist. 

Then, my friend went to Reds Salon at Ngee Ann City.

Different hairstylist, but same badass attitude.

That's not all.

The hairstylist also pulled out the shirt collar & aimed the hairdryer nozzle in!

 Why does Reds Salon have such a weird practise???

I was in bewilderment when I saw that!

Doesn't that defeat the purpose of tucking a towel in prior to the haircut?

My friend eventually found his dream hairstylist by the name of Alan at Nono Salon, Central Mall.

All was good for about a year.

Alan never made any fuss about my friend not wanting to shampoo his hair.

Then, Alan left the salon.

With no contact number or any indication of Alan's new workplace, my friend was back to square one.

The hunt for the elusive hairstylist starts all over again.

Somewhere last year, my friend ended up at Salon Vim.

Luckily at Salon Vim, there are a lot of male hairstylists.

They are really accomodating about my friend not wanting to shampoo his hair. 

No noise made, no fuss kicked up, no questions asked.

My friend pays the same price anyway.

I think my friend is too nice though. 

He gives a hairstylist 3 chances to prove him wrong.

If on the first time, the hairstylist does not cut the style he wants, my friend says maybe the stylist is not familiar with his needs.

Second time, my friend thinks maybe he will get it right the third time.

You and I know they will NEVER get it right by now!

It is amusing to see my friend going down the alphabets, like thumping through the Yellow Pages. 

At Salon Vim, he had his hair cut by hairstylists of names beginning with A, L, J & M.

On the fifth alphabet he risks his hair with, it was BINGO!

And that is....*cue drum roll*...the Letter I!!!!

This somehow reminds me of Sesame Street teaching alphabets. 

Hahaha!

I have seen all his haircuts done by the various alphabets and the previous emo ones. 

I can't understand why the vast difference.

Sometimes, he comes out looking nerdy.

Sometimes, he looks too funky for his profession.

Sometimes, he just looks really awful.

How can a basic hairstyle like this be so varied?

Letter I was off yesterday. 

My friend didn't know and had to get a haircut by another alphabet. 

Now he looks...oh well, since he doesn't read my blog...silly. 

The left sideburn tapers off, while the right sideburn has its ends shaved straight.

And there's this awkward hole on the back hairline.

What was the hairstylist thinking??

Luckily hair grows. 

For guys, even faster.

I'm not laughing at him. You know, right?

I worry about karma when I have the courage to go perm my hair next time.

By the way, if you have ever been to Salon Vim, do you realise that 90% of the male staff have pouffy hair crowns?

Is that the happening hairstyle among guys nowadays?
I see some young male clients leaving the salon with this type of hair style too.
I prefer the Andy Lau hairstyle though.
Lucky the Husband is not into such styles.
I can't imagine his hair being more voluminous than mine.

Alright, think I'm really getting old.

Morale of the story:

1. Know the off-days & leave of your favourite hairstylist.

2. And his mobile number too, in case he jumps ship one fine day.

3. Next time, bring a picture of Andy Lau along. 

It might just help.

4. Last resort, hunt down those old Chinese barber uncles who used to cut
that hairstyle for our forefathers. 

They can't go wrong too, right?

 Not quite sure how to label this post, maybe I should start a Jokes label.

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

Out and about

 A waaaaaay backdated post

Back in the month of August.

Photos taken by the Husband's Iphone.

Usually with him grumbling in the background about me not having my own camera and always hoarding his phone. 

Petty much! -___-

One day, EP-3, one day! Hmphf!

Hungry Ghosts' Festival.

Love buying those pre-packed all-in-one versions. So convenient!

You can choose the price range you fancy. 

Think ours is S$8/S$10. 

The more expensive the pack is, the more goodies there are inside!

Incense, candles, matchsticks, dried tea leaves, candies, hell notes of all denominations, gold bars, gold & silver coins, 往生紙, clothings (even have shoes & socks) printed on paper for both men & women, and even paper fabric! 

I don't fancy ciggies so I never buy those with cigarettes.

Don't wanna encourage our 'friends' to smoke either. Already dead...time to quit lah, 'friend'!

The Husband sloughed through the night to fold the 21 lotuses.

I think I was busy doing up a launch or something.

Hoping that their sufferings will be lessened, their negative karma will be purified and eventually, be reborn in the Pureland.

On a real random note, I wonder if I burn a paper camera to myself, will I eventually get one? 

Maybe I can bring a photo of Olympus EP-3 to the those offering-makers at Rochor and try my luck. 

Hahaha!

I love showing off Singapore via flags! I'm serious!

So I took out last year's car flag that I bought online to fix on the Husband's car window again. =D

Those mitten-like flags on the car's side mirrors are also very cute!

But I don't know where to buy them.

The Husband said the car flag was dusty and slightly tattered from last year. 

So he sneakily removed it before 31 Aug. =(

Never mind, I will go buy another one next July!

Late-night drives on various days to hunt for food.

My work schedule means sometimes I get to eat dinner at supper time. 

Luckily I live in Singapore, where food is all around and Sims Ave is not that far!

The well-known Rochor soyabean milk & beancurd along Sims Ave.

Opens daily 11am-1am. 

Cool! =D

Kinda interesting that they named themselves Rochor Restaurant.
Oh well, the Portuguese egg tarts are quite good though!
Better than KFC's!

 Tic-tac-toe!
Tough for me to finish a cup of soyabean milk and a tub of soya beancurd.
But I want both!
So I always ask for 2-in-1 ~ soya beancurd in hot soyabean milk & less sugar.
Real nourishing!
You should try it if you have not!

By the way, I really don't find their Chin Chow drink nice.
The vanilla essence is too strong for me. =(

The 24-hour 126 Dim Sum!

I like their dim sum much much more than those at Swee Choon.

Ever tried their 馬來糕? Better than Hoe Kee & Teck Kee too!

One more thing, their barley drink has 冬瓜糖 in it!

You know, those sugar-coated wintermelon strips that you can munch on!

So yummy! 

Very hard to find such barley drink outside, even restaurants. 

Most versions are just the plain barley drink. 

There's those wintermelon strips and barley inside the tub for you to eat too.

Best thing is, if you don't like your drink very sweet like me, you can order one tub of it (their drinks come in round tubs) and hot water.

Spilt the barley drink into 2 containers and pour hot water in both!

I avoid taking cold drinks generally.

Viola! Money saved in the name for better health!

My ratio of hot water to barley drink for 126 is 1:1.

It's really quite sweet for us, because in the hot version, there's no ice cubes to dilute the drink.

The Husband's subordinate was recently diagnosed as diabetic in his early forties, due to late-night drinking of Coca-cola for suppers over the years.

So do watch it, gals!

Hoe Kee Pau, further down Sims Ave.

It's also open for 24 hours, but apart from the occasional taxi uncles, I don't see youths chomping down their supper here, compared to 126 Dim Sum.

Maybe because the variety available here in the wee hours is not as extensive.

Or maybe the feng shui is not as great. =P

Hoe Kee's version of the barley drink is one of the least sweet around.

See! Got real barley at the bottom of the drink!

That proves the drink is not made from powder.

The coffeeshop where Punggol Nasi Lemak is, at Upper Serangon, sells barley drink made from barley powder. 

Discovered it one day when the Husband was there and saw the drinks stall assistant refilling the drink container with a big bag of powder.

Oh man! I don't like powdered barley that is processed!

Instead of barley at the bottom, there's this powdery residue that makes me coughs slightly and have a itchy throat after the drink. 

Qi Ji, the I-don't-know-whether-to-call-it-restaurant-or-food-eatery that sells popiah & nasi lemak etc, has very nice barley drink too.

Not too sweet plus chunks and chunks and chunks of barley for me to chew on until I'm jelat.

By the way, I think that barley drink photo is the nicest photo I've ever taken with the Iphone.

#photographerwannabe

I didn't know that the durian stalls along Sims Ave are opened 24 hours!

There's mineral water and fresh coconut drinks too!

Have to pay, of course

I like durians that are bitter.

Having durians at the above stall cost us S$70+!

Omg, I don't know how the Husband managed to order the 3 most expensive durians, at S$15/kg!

Lucky we had enough cash after dinner.

But still, very heart-pain. =(((

I also live in remorse that I fail to have more durians during their peak season in July.
Feeling so inadequate now.

  

Only consolation, free usage of Premier Deluxe 2-ply tissue paper, which is of 100% pulp dispensed from Kitty-chan box.

But I don't like Hello Kitty nor pink colour.

And isn't wet tissue more useful?

Or maybe they can supply both?

#greedySingaporean

You might not be able to tell from the photos, but it was VERY bright & well-lit at the durian stall.

I tried peeping closely to see which lightbulb brand they used.

Must be very good, since the lights are on for such long hours.

But alas, it was too bright for me to even squint!

Random snapshot from the car.

I think the translations, both English & Chinese, are so clever!

Apart from the hawker haunts, I was so thrilled to discover 2 24-hour hotel cafes!

When I was a kid, a lot of hotel cafes or coffeehouses, as known back then, operated 24 hours.

Now, it's very hard to find such coffeehouses when even swanky 5-star hotels don't do so.

Chatterbox at Mandarin Hotel is not so great for food & ambience anymore too.
It only operates 24 hours on Fridays, Saturdays and public holiday eves.
Normally, it closes at 1am

Cafe Mosiac at Carlton Hotel is located opposite Chijmes & along the same stretch as Bras Basah Complex.

Not only does it operate 24 hours, it has a VERY extensive menu too!

Most hotel places I know have a limited menu after 10pm or so.

But at Carlton, it's the SAME menu throughout!

I like having my meal at the inner area of the cafe and watch the cars or rather, many many late-night cabs drive by.

It's a much more spacious and airy area too.

There's soups, salads, pizza (not-so-nice), sandwiches, pasta (I like!), more Western food, Chinese-style carrot cake (black or white, both are yummy!), curry chicken (a lot of meat! 2 can share.), chicken rice, wanton noodle, fruit juices, creme brulee, panna cotta and a lot more Asian food that I can't recall!

Prices are generally S$18-23+++ for the usual main courses.
I'm not talking about the steaks or baked fish, which are way more expensive.

I like that I can ask for warm breadrolls with butter.
No, not because it's free but it's my all-time favourite food!
Only thing is, their breadrolls are exactly the same as those usually served onboard SQ economy class.
Kinda deja-vu because last time, I eat until I'm scared. Lol.

Granted not everything on the menu is fantastic nor cheap, it's nonetheless relaxing to dine in a nice, quiet cafe that has great air-conditioning and clean toilets for me to brush my teeth afterwards. Haha!

I like their curry chicken!
I would request for more potatoes and less meat though.
The usual portion has like 8 big pieces of chicken. Too much even for the Husband & I to share!

Cafe Mosiac's Black Carrot Cake is really nice!
Those good hawker stalls' standard!

There's easily more than 50 items for you to choose from.
They even have a kids menu! Plus they leave jars of hot water on the table so I don't have to call them for refills so often.
How thoughtful!

P.s. I noticed Cafe Mosiac use different crockery (plain white plates) after midnight.
And the food portion is more too.

Will blog about the other 24-hour hotel cafe next round!

I just read that Iphone 5 is launching in USA around mid Oct.
Does that mean it will be in Singapore in Nov???
Pretty sure it will be before December, so that the big boys can make $$$ from all the X'mas shoppers!
A 8-megapixel camera!! I'm so excited!!!
My first smartphone!

Have a happy Wednesday!!

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

小姐，要買。。。嗎？

I was in the same lift as the Yakult lady.

You know, the ladies who peddles Yakult door-to-door weekly with their bicycles
and a little ice box for the tiny bottles of Lactobacillus casei.

Source: yakult.com.sg

 The Yakult lady looked just like one of them.

I was fascinated.
All these years, these ladies strike me as very hardworking and efficient people.

I always like Yakult over Vitagen.

The Meji cultured milk drink just doesn't hit the right spot.

I remembered visiting the Yakult plant at Senoko when I was a kid.

It was so awesome-ly bewildering!

Though I can't recall if it was a school excursion or a Community Centre educational trip.

Did you know touring the Yakult factory is free??

Mondays to Fridays : 10.00am – 11.30am
2.00pm – 3.30pm

T: 67561033 ext 77 / 79

Each tour takes about 1.5 hour and you will be escorted by their PR staff.

Plus you get a free bottle of Yakult to drink!!

#gianpengSingaporean
 I wonder if we get to choose flavour.
I only like Ace Light.
#gianpeng&mahuanSingaporean

Remember to call and check for slot availablilty before heading down to the Wonderland of Lactobacillus casei!

I think it's a such fun thing to do with your friends or kids!

Anyway, back to my first point, yes, I was intrigued by the Yakult auntie and sensing my interest, she started asking me if I drink Yakult.
See! I told you they are hardworking!
Working even in an elevator ride!

The conversation eventually morphed into me asking her how long she had been selling Yakult.
She said ever since she moved into the estate, which was 3 years ago.
“負擔重，沒辦法！”
In her words.

She offered me her name card to call if I wanted to buy Yakult and told me she delivers every Wednesday.
And sometimes, if most of her customers were not at home, she would come again on Thursday.
很賣命hor?

What I bought from the Yakult auntie.
It's the same price as buying from supermarkets. =)

And then another day, this teenager boy came up to me when I was about to unlock my house door.
There was another chubby boy with him.
They didn't look Ah Bengs.
They WERE Ah Bengs.



Turned out that they were from some Boys' Home (having committed some petty crime) and peddling Magnolia ice-cream in boxes
That kind that the ice-cream uncle cut out rectangles of it and sandwich it between 2 slices of wafer biscuits.

The boy showed a letter to prove that they were authentic and not some con men.
Selling ice-cream was part of their reform or something.

These 2 boys were really eloquent!

The chubby boy launched his sale pitch when my neighbour came to answer his door and was saying something like:


“先生，希望你不要看不起我們因爲我們曾經犯過法！”
  
Wah, 打同情牌！

While the teenager boy was pitching his sales talk, all I was thinking was:

This young chap might make a good Postboy. He looks strong.
Like an experienced street fighter.
Sure can carry the endless bags of parcels.
Woah, check out the big tattoo on his calf.
Can talk so well, pity mine is an online shop and not a physical shop.
If I can employ him, this reminds me of the Yellow Ribbon project.
Kinda great how Yellow Ribbon project has helped so many ex-inmates.
Wonder if he's going to impress me with his vocabulary of expletives if I don't buy.  
At least, he's earning money the legitimate way.
That's something worth encouraging him.

One box of chocolate chip ice-cream at S$20.

I bought. 

Though I know it's crap that a A5-sized box of Magnolia ice-cream is selling for that price.

No lah, not under threat.
Honestly, I couldn't be sure if their cause was authentic.
But selling ice-cream wasn't that illegal anyway.

I wonder how much he actually earn from it.

 My rule of thumb in life is no saleman will be turned away from my doorstep, if I can determine that he/she is not a conman. 

I know first hand how tough it is to be doing door-to-door sale.

And of course, must be something I generally can use/eat.

就當是結個善緣！

Afer he left, I had a nagging feeling that I should have said something motivating to him.

Like:

I think it's great that you are earning money legally now and not being a loanshark runner.

Amazing that you are willing to and can turn over a new leaf!
You're still so young & can talk so well! No fear of no proper job next time!

By the way, you wanna work for TFL when you are, erm, released?

Alright, I made up the loanshark runner part.

Neither am I that sure he will make a good candidate for TFL work. 

I don't know if saying something encouraging will make any difference to him.

He might just retort me with a "You think you're my mother ah? Pui! $#*#%$@!"

Then what do I say?

But as long as someone, be it the Yakult auntie or this teenage boy, is putting in the effort to make money the right way and not just sit there, complaining about life, the government and every other teeny-weeny thing, don't they all deserve a pat on the back, in one way or another?

I convince myself that everyone likes to hear good things about themselves.

Next time, I will pluck up the courage and say something nice.

If the teenage boy's cause is a hoax, he might just feel guilty and give me a discount.

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

婆婆，你還好嗎？

 I've been wanting to write this down for years. 

Now that I've a space to write, I don't know how to start.

Without a heavy heart.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you like mooncakes?

I do, very much.

Not the traditional ones though.

A tad too heaty for me.

For the past 10 years at least, I buy those from East Ocean Teochew Restaurant.

This year, they expanded to more sale outlets.
Apart from the usual Taka Fair, Bugis Junction, CCK Lot One, East Ocean mooncakes are also available at NEX and Compass Point! =D

Mini snowskin mooncakes!

They used to do it with lotus paste and almond flakes in it.

The crunchy almond flakes are so nice!

But now they only have it with Custard, Lotus Paste and Green Tea.

If you buy the big ones, they come with yolks.

That I can do without.
For the first time this year, I tried Goodwood Park snowskin durian mooncakes.
And wow, they were really yummy!
I wish I bought more!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tried starting off with a distraction, but my mind is still a blank.

It was another day of me bringing Grandma to SGH for her bi-weekly medical checkup.

Hospital waits were always long and dreadful.
In a clinical environment surrounded by tens and tens of ill people.
Not exactly inspiring.
But in the 2-3 hour wait, I had to stay upbeat and chit-chat with Grandma to keep her spirits up.

“你整天要飛來飛去，婆婆老了，

我懂你孝順。你忙，你就不用來看婆婆了”

“不會啦，婆婆！我下班后，閑得很！”

Truth is, I was always dog dead tired, travelling from Woodlands to Lower Delta, many a times still in a jet-lagged and muscle-aching condition.

Woodlands (my in-laws home) was far from everywhere, except Johor.
I really think so.

Even if I took a cab, I needed 45 minutes to reach.

There were days I wish I didn't have to go.

But I was the only working adult in the extended family who had off days on weekdays.

The doctor always schedule Grandma's appointments on weekdays.

Given the horrendous queue on weekdays, I dared not imagine having to go SGH on a weekend.

Hearing Grandma saying those words above pained me a lot.

It was like her telling me that she was prepared to be neglected and not see the doctor anymore.

And just wait for the inevitable. 

 “等一下，你跟醫生說我的肚子很痛。”

Grandma had cervical cancer. 

She didn't wanted to do any operation.

As days went by, she complained of the increasing pains in her body.

In Westeren medicine, the doctor can only prescribed painkillers.

Everytime, I would try to comfort and console her that it will get better or lame stuff like telling her not to think about the pain and focus on something else.

Cancer medication was very costly.

Thank goodness I could pay for it via my Medisave.

There comes a time whereby I just ran out of words to say.
Because the pain in her was slowly devouring a lot of her. 
I didn't know if lying was the best way to comfort her.

“我不知道能不能夠看到你結婚。” 

“婆婆，我下個月就結婚了！你一定會看到我嫁人！說不定，你還會看到我生孩子！

我買新衣服給你那天穿。你一定要來看我結婚！”

Grandma was teary-eyed the whole 2 days during my wedding celebrations.

I took lots of photos with her.

Whenever I visited Grandma, I always ask her,

“婆婆，你好嗎？”

Of course, I already knew the answer.

I would act hyper, make a clown out of myself and crack silly jokes to cheer Grandma up.

She used to sit in her favourite chair in the living room and watch TV.

She could still go to the market in her wheelchair and chit-chat with her kakis.

Then one day, she could only lie down on her bed and watch the world go by.

It never fail to be a challenge to get Grandma on and off the taxis for her medical appointments.

The maid was definitely more expert than me.

Taxi uncles we met were so helpful and patient.

Thank you to you all!

 “婆婆, 你要不要歸依？每個人心裏都應該有個歸屬，日後你才知道要往哪裏去。你既然曾供奉觀音菩薩十多年，不如就歸依佛門，和我歸依一樣的師父，好嗎？”

“哈哈哈！你幾時變得那麽迷信啊？”

It was a hilarious moment when Grandma started crackling in the taxi enroute to hospital.

I was like, "Since when it's 'official-ing' your religious direction a supersition??"
"Grandma, you're the one who have been sewing the robes for Guan Yin all those years!"
Haha! #defensive

Grandma's condition was deteriorating rapidly.
I knew the day was near.
Grandma has never mentioned what type of funeral she wanted.
Maybe like most elder Chinese, they don't like to talk about death.

Or maybe, they didn't know there's a difference.

Eventually, she did took refuge.
That was a huge relief to me.

I taught her how to chant Amituofo.
I told her to direct her thoughts to be reborn in the Pureland.<
That was the only thing I could talk to her during her last days.

I mean, what else matters then?
Money, career, marriage, family, travel, aspirations?
The things we talk about when we meet our girlfriends?

Or continue giving her false hope that she will recover miraclously?

“師父，可否請您幫我算我的婆婆還有多少時間？請您告訴我， 好讓我能安排在新加坡!”

I hated flying.
I had no freedom of time to speak of.

Master Dai Hu wasn't willing to do the prediction for me.
It was one of the taboos for a geomancer.

I persisted.
I couldn't imagine being in some far-flung land and unable to fly back to Singapore, simply there is NO flight back on that day or NO seat available.

“不過八月十五。”
 
Never done it in my 6 years of flying, but I was all prepared to get an MC, by hook or by crook.
If my roster takes me away nearing that period.

“Miss Lee, your grandmother has to be warded. She has a drastic drop in her blood count. We need to do a blood transfusion for her.”

That was the first time I admitted Grandma into the hospital, after her medical appointment.

I was 27. 

I tried calling my mum to ask her if I could proceed.

Mum couldn't be reached.

It was unnerving at that moment to make the decision on the spot.

I wished I didn't have to handle such big decisions at that time.

I was supposed to be an adult, but I felt like a kid who wasn't ready to handle these kind of responsibilities.

During Grandma's hospital stay, I spent 3-4 hours there till midnight.
Talking to her.
Watching her fall in and out of sleep.
Accompanying her to chant silently.
And just being there.

Seeing death creeping onto her face ever so slowly and taking all of the life left in her was very heartbreaking.

She was discharged after a week.

Then one week later, she was admitted again.
By me again, after her medical appointment.

It was the fourteenth day of the eighth month, in the Lunar Calendar.

I was deliberating whether to return home to sleep.
I was totally washed out over the last few weeks.

Doc said her condition was stable after blood transfusion.

Colour was evident in Grandma's face.
In fact, she was looking even better than the past few months.
She told me to go home and rest.
I hesitated, remembering Master Dai Hu's prediction.
Grandma insisted.

I thought, for a flicking second, maybe she would pull through this again.
Everything was looking good.
Maybe my prayers were heard.
Maybe Master Dai Hu would be wrong this time.

And I went home around 130am.
On the fifteenth day of the eighth month, in the Lunar Calendar.

“You quick come! Quick come! Ah Ma calling for you! She want see you!”

 
It was 1020am.
The maid called me in a fluster.
I asked about Grandma's conditon.
But we couldn't understand each other very well.
I thought it was just Grandma waking up and wondering where I was.

I couldn't get a cab. 

I reached SGH at 130pm.
My relatives were already there.
Crying.

I didn't make it.
I didn't make it.
I didn't make it. 
Grandma passed away.
On the fifteenth day of the eighth month, in the Lunar Calendar.

Why the hell did I go home?
Why was I such a smart alec to think I know better?
Why on earth did I ask and not believe Master Dai Hu?
Where was I when Grandma was calling for me?
Oh damn it, damn it, why do I even need to sleep?

 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wish I was there to hold Grandma's hands, as she took her last breath.
I wish she didn't have to die, waiting for me to come & wanting to see me.
I wish she didn't die with only a maid by her side, because everyone thought she would pull through.
I wish I told my family earlier about Master Dai Hu's prediction.

I wish I wasn't so rash and emotional then.
I wish I didn't throw a tantrum at my family during Grandma's funeral.
My goodness, what was I even thinking?

And I will never have a chance to redo everything all over again.

I never forgive myself.

I don't want to forgive myself.
I fear I will have the same regret when the same thing happens to my other loved ones, if I forgive myself.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

婆婆，

你還好嗎？
我沒有飛來飛去了。
我現在做自己很喜歡的生意，設網店賣女生的包包，也有自己品牌的包包和鞋子。
我的店名是“添芬藍”。
添購的添，芬芳的芬，藍空的藍。
你覺得好聽嗎？是師父取的。
他說這名字會大大幫助我打響名聲。 
真的有哦！添芬藍有上新明日報和時尚雜誌耶！
快三年了，一切都很穩定。
有很多女生說她們很喜歡添芬藍的商品。
有時，我做到很辛苦但讀了她們的電郵就會很開心！

今年， 在你的忌日前，我已念了地藏經回向給你﹑公公和祖先。
我還會念多兩遍，功德都回向給你們。
我也抄了兩本真佛經，並折 了蓮花焚化給你們。
你們不要忘記念佛哦！
不要一直眷念我們哦！

對唔住，婆婆。
係我唔乖，係我不孝。
我會改。 我會更懂事。
 對唔住，婆婆。

Metta,
欣雨 Xinyu

This post is written over a span of 5 days, from 11-16 Sept.

But I backdate it to be published on 12 Sept, 10:45am.

八月十五，1045am.

The time Grandma left.